If I could give it all up
by Tutor-girl-107
Summary: One shot. What would happen if I traded all of it for love? I suck at summaries. R


I sat in the chair for 10th time. It was my birthday. Everyone says that my birthday is supposed to be happy. This is different. My name is Bella, and when I was four I was given up for adoption by my parents. They had money problems, and couldn t afford to keep me. Im turning 14 now. My orphanage owner looked at me and said Make a wish, Bella, anything you want I look at her, with the cold eyes that always come out when im hurt. Everyone knew exactly what I wanted. I wanted to feel loved, more than anything in this world. I wanted a family. I closed my eyes, and I blew out my candles, not one wish should be made.

I walked back to my room. The one I spent every night in. It was the same way it always was, lonely and cold. I found my pyjamas that was in my drawers that only had, a couple of things in, and I changed quickly, before Mrs. Clearwater came in to tuck me in. I got into my bed, with the wool sheets, that made me itch, the ones that were never soft, and never felt like they were from someone that cared.

After Mrs. Clearwater came in and said good night I lid there, as I often did, and I looked up. When I was younger I always felt loved, by these people I call my family. The truth is, it was starting to hit me that, they would never be my family, and I was never loved. This was just a way for them to make money. I wanted a family more than ever, even if I didn t know what being loved was like, I wanted to feel it. It never bothered me until this year, as I started to get older, the more I wanted a family. I felt sleep approaching, I knew that it was time to give in, and stop fighting the evident. For one thing, I was bound to be alone for the rest of my life, and two, I would never know what being loved was like.

I went to all of my classes the following day, and it was still on my mind. I wanted a family so bad, and when one of my teachers caught me daydreaming she told me I should go talk to Headmaster Black. So as I walked down the shadowed hall way, my thoughts wandered, to a life where everything was okay, and by the time I reached the office, I was crying. Crying for the family I wanted and needed so bad. Mrs. Black called me into her office, and when I sat down, I simply told her everything. I can think of my exact words now what if I gave it all up. All of my life here and all of the memories that I have made, just gave it all up, do you think that I could finally have a family? She shook her head and I knew that the answer would be no. I just, thought that everything would be okay, talking to the person that was supposed to be a mom to all the kids here. She told me that I wasn t alone and to look around me and see everyone else without families. When I walked through the hallway upon leaving her office, I noticed that she was wrong. I was alone. No one could ever know how I feel. How much it hurt, to know that no one out there wanted anything to do with you. So I started that day, I wished on every first star at night, and every 11:11. I prayed to god, and I worked my hardest every time someone came in to meet me.

I spent the next year, doing the same thing every day and night. But nothing changed and by my next birthday, I was sitting in that same seat. Im turning 15. Mrs. Clearwater looked at me and said make a wish and again, I looked up at her, with my cold eyes, but this time something changed. I knew this is what I was waiting for all year. My birthday wish. This is what I needed to help my wish come true. So I closed my eyes, and I wished for that family, that feeling of love, I blew out my candles, and opened my eyes. The moment was gone, and I was back in the orphanage. I walked the long hallway to my room and said good night to Mrs. Clearwater. I didn t think this time. I just let myself fall asleep.

Two weeks later, my life changed. A woman walked into the orphanage looking for an older girl. She thought babies were too much to handle, so Mrs. Clearwarer, told her that I was the one she would want to take home. I was an independent person and I wouldn t be any trouble to take care of. Much to my surprise she said, alright, I don t even need to meet her, tell her she is coming home with me.

As I walked out of the orphanage, it hit me that I was leaving behind a lifetime of memories and that I would never see Mrs. Clearwater again. She was a mom to me, for the past 11 years, and I was just leaving her behind for someone I barley knew. I let my tears fall freely as I walked out the doors for the last time. I looked back at the place I called home, and I knew that all I wished for was right here the whole time. Part of me wanted to run, and stay in that place forever, but I felt the hand on my shoulder, it was Esme. My new mom and at that very moment I knew, when she turned me around, wiped my tears away, and pulled me into a hug, that I was loved. Not one thing in the world was going to change it. Esme loved me, and after I wished on every star in the sky, every 11:11, and last, my 15th birthday cake, that my wish was finally coming true, and I wouldn t want it to be with anyone else, because, I have finally felt, love.


End file.
